my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told the guy that if he didn't put enough pepperoni to earn the name " pepperoni feast", that I was gonna sue him for all he had. Believe it or not, that's all I remember.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
Randomize