Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
I distinctly remember telling him "I'll suck your dick while you eat pizza"
My new roommate is awesome. His father owns a bar and his sister has an E cup. I'm going to be with him forever
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
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