My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
They only knew me as the lesbian that passed out in a bathtub. That's not what you call friendship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
Randomize