we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely almost got hit in the face with a baby
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
Where are you? This girl fell on a baby. She is just gone. Please Hurry
I'm hurrying
Dude. She just shit herself.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
No. We can't get pedicures until my toenails grow back.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
Um that's okay I got up on the table at IHOP and terrorized the entire restaurant for a phone charger after I stole the whip cream from the kitchen and started eating it out the can
You took off your shirt and pulled out a bottle of cherry uv and a slushee. That's when I knew you came to party
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
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