I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
im probably the most hungover person watchin icarly right now
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
my boss told me he would look for my wallet when he went back to the strip club tonight.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have got to stop singing on voicemails. I just left my dad a 6 minute musical message.
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
And before you knew it they were calling me the pussy usher or something like that
Dude, I'm pretty sure I slept with my TA's girlfriend
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
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