Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
Your girlfriend is in jail- I've just never been able to use that in a sentence before. Thank you both!
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
This guy is clearly nuts his idea of a hangover cure is a six pack poured into a camelpack then hiking 3 miles with a weighted vest. He said "learned it in the army i guess drink beer beat the heat"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
yo dude not sure how this happened but im drunk at your house eating burritos with your mom and sister. hope you're having fun in new zealand
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
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