He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
the mechanics of walkigng feel weird right now everyone lools like a demon
what does alcohol mean
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
On a side note the mornings you do so much Xanax that you wake up totally at one with the universe and feel invincible are great
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
Apparently I came into our room and told her that there should be a zipline from our window to Walgreens so that I could get chicken noodle soup
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
How was I supposed to know the accent was fake before i slept with him
Randomize