I'm not saying he has herpes, I'm just saying he slept with my friend that has herpes.
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just wanted to clarify that I am not bisexual and had no intentions of ACTUALLY penetrating my roommate with a can of bugspray.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I deleted his number so I had to go into my old voicemails which are saved through my gmail and search his name... Never underestimate the resourcefulness of a drunk girl on a mission for dick
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
i think the realest test of our friendship is how hot your sister looks right now
If a treadmill opens up I'll run next to him and then fall off so he has to give me mouth to mouth
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