I was just tapping my foot in the bathroom at Penn Station just PRAYING for anonymous sex. You know how that goes.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
New Jersey isn't a real state, it's just a myth you tell little kids to scare them like Canada or Carrot Top
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is cat milk safe for human consumption?
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
Vomit your little heart out. You've got a long day tomorrow
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
If I told the doordash driver it's national nudity day, think he'd still report me for being topless at the door?
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