ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
The irony of calling it Pride is that you do things that no one should be proud of.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
I woke up on the toilet with my feet gorilla glued to the floor, cake and makeup on my face and my hand glued to my head.
Welcome to the world of vodka. Rule #1: NEVER PASS OUT. Happy 21st
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't ask me how or why, but I'm drunk with German diplomats. Come over. Now
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
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