just walked by a lingerie store, the sign out front, "Specials for Father's Day", in no way is that just not wrong.
Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I walked into my house with my pants inside out, no shoes and a limp. My mom asked me if I had fun but I passed out before I could reply...
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
what the fuck is wrong with you
Do you want me to go chronologically or alphabetically?
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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