You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
I just want you to know that were having pizza delivered to the emergency room
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
and a jello shot exploded in my bra last night. Now I have blueberry smurfette boobs. Awesome.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
This girl ordered Hershey syrup and red wine and he made it for her
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
I mean I made my therapist laugh so hard she cried....so yes, my life is literally a joke to everyone
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize