Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm home with mono, wearing knee high socks, shorts, a stained old shirt, and a surgical mask. He comes over ANYWAY with soup, a gas mask, billions of DVDs, and eats me out. He's either stupid, whipped, or i'm just THAT good.
You told me I was special while we were having sex and I asked why.
What did I say?
Don't ask me questions while I have an erection,
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
I took my makeup off with mouthwash. Seemed like a good idea. It worked.
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize