she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
im not trying to sound dramatic, but im covered in microwavable lasagna
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That awkward moment when the dude you blew on camera in college friend requests you on Facebook.
Who is this?!????
That awkward moment when you think you're texting a friend the above statement, but instead you text a stranger.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize