That reminds me...we need to get swords
I took my vicodin with tequila. I can FEEL gravity...
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well in DOG beers, i've only had one
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Bro, she said my penis was the best thing to happen to her mouth since teeth.
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
I just bought a 1/4 oz of pot from a coworker who's old enough to be my grandfather...I'm never leaving Portland.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I just got yelled at by a stripper for being a tease.
I need a significant other who'll eat Skittles from my boobs
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