its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
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just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
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I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
"They let me see the x-ray. My nose is broken. I saw it. It was cool. Well, I guess it would be cooler if it wasn't my nose."
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
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