thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
he just said he was sorry he wasnt been able to come by more often coz things are really crazy with that girl
you mean his girlfriend
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
And i'll likely end up sleeping in a bush wrapped up in my poncho
In the ER with Chelz, I may have broken her ankle during sex. Lovely.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Woo is fucking right, dude. Vodka night tonight. Honestly, every night pretty much seeems like vodka night lately. My liver wants to move out of my body like I gave it an eviction notice.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
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