I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
Hookers taste better with whip cream
Maybe we ought to get some pennicillin too
Fair enough
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We did face masks and fucked...he really isn't gay, what they say about europeans is just true
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
i told you he always needs adult supervision he just tazered himself
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize