I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
there is no amount of schooling that prepares you for when your morbidly obese 45 year old patient tells you she has her clit pierced.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Im shrooming at the foot of a tree on top of a mountain. Feeling fly as fuckin socrates and bon iver.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
PS: I just woke up from my shower
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
Randomize