I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry I forced you to take an adderall at 1am and then proceeded to dance to Lose Yourself outside of Qdoba.
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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