Texts From Last Night

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  (303): View more from Colorado

  So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.

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  (303): So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl. http://tfl.nu/7x7a
  Replies (4) Good night (959) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..

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  (607): Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits.. http://tfl.nu/aan9
  Replies (91) Good night (4822) Bad night (772) Order T-Shirt
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  (972): View more from Texas

  i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer

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  (972): i'm all for saving the environment, but when we get into the shower to fuck, he shouldn't flip his shower hourglass timer http://tfl.nu/kbap
  Replies (12) Good night (563) Bad night (4174) Order T-Shirt
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  (734): View more from Michigan

  the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.

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  (734): the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. http://tfl.nu/aea7
  Replies (16) Good night (927) Bad night (3902) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?

  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Winning.

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  (412): fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life? (717): Winning. http://tfl.nu/sgsw
  Replies (74) Good night (7007) Bad night (846)
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  (415): View more from California

  I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny

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  (415): I was so drunk i thought Kathy Griffin was funny http://tfl.nu/icdv
  Replies (41) Good night (862) Bad night (4051) Order T-Shirt
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  (631): View more from New York

  i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to.

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  (631): i just woke up at 8pm naked in my bed, with a fresh haircut. I wonder what barber i went to. http://tfl.nu/8bc1
  Replies (6) Good night (4254) Bad night (466) Order T-Shirt
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  (703): View more from Virginia

  Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.

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  (703): Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice. http://tfl.nu/mxxc
  Replies (19) Good night (5956) Bad night (1232) Order T-Shirt
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  (760): View more from California

  Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.

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  (760): Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule. http://tfl.nu/62pd
  Replies (24) Good night (1189) Bad night (4104) Order T-Shirt
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  (785): View more from Kansas

  In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?

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  (785): In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out? http://tfl.nu/d8g6
  Replies (6) Good night (1170) Bad night (3356) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe.

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  (206): I need a leash, or some shame. Maybe. http://tfl.nu/2cd4
  Replies (4) Good night (1664) Bad night (595) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.

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  (512): At this point I just want to meet a man with a job. http://tfl.nu/97ts
  Replies (13) Good night (1679) Bad night (1466) Order T-Shirt
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  (360): View more from Washington

  We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.

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  (360): We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent. http://tfl.nu/utkw
  Replies (8) Good night (2898) Bad night (1016) Order T-Shirt
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  (248): View more from Michigan

  There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style

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  (248): There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style http://tfl.nu/z785
  Replies (5) Good night (1935) Bad night (505) Order T-Shirt
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  (601): View more from Mississippi

  Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm.

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  (601): Maybe before the beach I should get a tracking chip in my arm. http://tfl.nu/epij
  Replies (7) Good night (860) Bad night (341) Order T-Shirt

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