I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just saw an ad for "Liver-aid" how has this not become a life changing drug for millions?
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
Last night’s booty call turned into a cuddlefest. Get your game face on, we’re hunting dick tonight
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