I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wish there was a morning after pill that made you instantly sober
So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it too much to ask that he stop calling me 'titty fuck' in public?
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
I'm amazed your boyfriend is still with you, how do you manage to pee on him while he is holding you in his lap?
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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