i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Wait do you remember that guy last night asking to use my nose ring to open his beer.......
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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