omg, he ripped it...he ripped my vagina...best. night. ever.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
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Well if he truly loves me he will just have to accept my flaws. And that includes a tequila dependency and borderline lesbianism.
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
DAMMIT. BOHEMIAN RHAPSODY IS GONNA GET STUCK IN MY HEAD AGAIN. FUCK YOU OLYMPICS.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
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