sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Did you get the "i have a yeast infection from that wet frat bathroom floor" text?
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
I think I fell in love last night
That guy had a face tattoo and was named Cheddar. Please tell me you’re kidding.
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
Reminder to self: never have sex on a trampoline. Trampoline burn hurts worse than carpet burn.
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