I like to think it a success when the cops are called
No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he made me scream out "#24" while we fucked...no more football players
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
You'd think somebody who rolls blunts like jesus himself could roll a god damn burrito
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, since I switched back to this phone I've found a crop of dick pics and your funeral arrangements.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Despite how often it occurs, I have absolutely no interest in having sex with myself
You know how fear has a smell? Well turns out shame has a smell too. It's Pina colada flavored anal grease.
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