Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
So right when I was pulling her underwear off with my teeth, she told me, "Stick your penis in my 'nanners." Needless to say, there was no penis-'nanner interaction.
Just got new surround sound speakers for my computer... I feel like I'm actually IN the porn now.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
Dont worry about getting me anything... Just put a bow on your ass.
Deal.
We hooked up. It felt slightly wrong considering he is my foreign exchange student but there's a reason America imports. Foreigners got the goods.
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
Enjoy the penises
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
How did you interpret 'wheat thins' from 'vaginal trauma'?
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
We kicked down a door together last night, pretty sure that qualifies us as best friends.
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