Is your liver wearing a sombrero yet?
No...more like a life jacket.
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like pulling a bottle of vodka out of your purse at 7am in the security line to make your fellow passengers uncomfortable...
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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