I just went through her cupboards. Eye patch and sword. nowhere near each other. different shelfs.
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
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I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Can't talk, ducks in the car
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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