Kirsten Dunst is sitting next to me in a bar in NYC
Tell her I want my money back for Elizabethtown.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
My girlfriend and my fuck buddy both started their periods this weekend. The good news is, neither of them are pregnant. The bad news is, I'll have to find someone else to fuck til next weekend. No wait.....that's good news too.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
$200 on plane. $110 on train. $5 per drink on plane. $15 per case on train. Plane 1 hour flight. Train 9 hour excursion. Hmmmmm.
How do you respond to a booty call from yesterday?
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
He left a full handprint on my ass. He called it a "five-star review."
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
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