I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
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well after he sqeezed a zit off his forearm i got the hell outta there
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told him you were auditioning guys for your new show: "So You Think You Can Fuck."
Best pick-up line ever!
I'm ok. I've got the pantsless-with-dignity thing down pat
Our music was glorious. Maidens were deflowered to the sound of my voice.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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