When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
I'm sorry I've been mean recently but tbh it really turns me on seeing you cry so it might happen a lot..... You're a pretty crier I don't get it
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
He in a way got kinda cockblocked by Jesus
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