She said her name was "party"
My brain says no but my pants say off.
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The lady at the touchless car wash just gave me the look of death. How do I say, "sorry it's not my puke" in Spanish?
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
YOU GOT KINKY WEIRD ICE CREAM HEAD ON FRIDAY DONT EVEN COMPLAIN.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Passed out in someones front yard last night. Got woke u?p by a lady walking her dog at 6am. Rock bottom.
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