I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
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I feel like my teeth are caked on with other teeth. What did I just smoke?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
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Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
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