the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just egged your windshield and it froze on contact. Have fun with that.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
I just want a sensitive guy who will get drunk with me then take me out to steal things. Is that too much to ask?
I just did something so unspeakable in the panera bathroom that their health score dropped 10 points.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
my penis made a compromise with my morals
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