omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe one day we'll get unicorn butt tattoos together
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Enjoy the penises
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize