HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
is it sad that pink shorts and cowboy hats remind me of getting jizz in the hair?
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Oh. My. God. Best non-relationship, he-might-be-cheating-on-his-boyfriend-but-I-can't-tell-because-of-the-language-barrier sex EVER!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Karaoke makes my soul die one wretched song at a time
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
(540): I ran 10 miles and then took a dump behind a rock. What the fuck have you done with a hangover that's comparable?
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
Out of curiosity, do you feel happiness for you, or sadness for ME, that you are the only one I drunk text?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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