i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
I can't take 'get a man' advice from you. You'll stick your penis in a warm banana peel.
Our livers get a hall pass for 2020, right?
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
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