There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
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Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I HAVE stop dating guys for their prescriptions, you have no idea how awkward family dinner was. Thank god for his xanax.
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
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Haha I'm surprised I didn't see you I was drunkenly buying $70 in merchandise including a vibrating cock ring at that cvs around that time
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I disagree, if your last name is Weiner then the sending of dick pics should be mandatory. I'd give him a pass.
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
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