i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
i think my love is proven by the fact that i still want to have sex with you after this conversation
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
I decided to let him keep the rest of my good weed as an "I'm sorry for being a drunk ass ho" consolation prize.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
Wait, like drink with real Phil. Or Phil, the cat that sometimes lived in your closet in Myrtle Beach?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
Randomize