my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my bf wants us to fuck our way into the new year.. how original..
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
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It's a lightpost hitting you in the head. Of course it's going to hurt the day after.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I convinced a shit ton of people I was a russian foreign exchange student to get free drinks. I knew learning those accents would come in handy.
I can control the tv with my phone while pooping on the second floor. I thought you should know for future reference
Some crack addled fool from the sketch ass motel behind the restaurant just gave me a flyer for an AA group when I was on my smoke break. I don't do mornings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I don't think I'm gonna survive today. I don't remember how to walk. I must crawl 6 blocks to my bed.
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
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