His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
i just overheard someone saying that they invented the 'tequila mockingbird' last night. sorry, but i found better friends
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
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i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
The only rule I'm making for myself tonight is to not drink out of the sink at the bar.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
I've got a bottle of water, a bag of salad greens, and a bottle of hot sauce. How stoned do you think I am?
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