apparently my drunken alterego is a lazyeyed bisexual.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
The gym has a pool
my gym membership just went from "way to get in shape" to "place to go swim when I'm high"
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Now I have the opportunity to have Chris Pratt or Channing Tatum?!? What a time to be alive.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize