He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
if i were reduced to my simplest elements, i would be jizz and glitter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
Just convinced airport security that im sober. All i do is win.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest i'm almost glad he got arrested. His girlfriend and i kept making out so i'm pretty sure the alternative was a threesome. Now we're just the trashy girls who visit him in jail.
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
Randomize