i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
you yelled "you will never make love to jesus" and then ran into the tv.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
Well I tried to steal a golf cart. I fought with the Chick-Fil-A cow. And other things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
I feel like someone kicked me repeatedly in the ribs. I don't think sex is supposed to do that.
We made a bet that we had to talk like Yoda all night at the bars
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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