we have officially lost it.
I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His status said "sad." of course I liked it. I don't even care that I was the only one. Facebook isn't your god damn journal, we don't care about your problems.
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
I promised her I would shit on your driveway. There's nothing that you or I can do about it now.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
I need mimosas to revive my soul
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