i didn't know you could wash puke off of bras with a dishwasher.
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I think I should just go up to him and say, "before I invest time in this could I just take a look at your penis?"
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I'm not the one who gave a guy that lives next door to my grandmother a blowjob in a pub bathroom in Ireland, you have no room to judge.
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
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