Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its like fishing. just send her some cock shots to keep her on the hook then use tequila to reel her in
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
No fireworks. Throwing the old microwave off the deck.
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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