I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Dude, chad is laying across the room, violently, passionately, pornographicly eating something and I seriously think the 'some thing' is fighting back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
What's the plan?
Not sure. I think I'll take a dump on his windshield.
My arm is completely dead, never again will i give you a 20 minute hand job. You better have enjoyed that asshole. I have to text with my left hand now.
Randomize